Salmonriver: How a Purple Tele-Tubby might destroy your child. (or, "I think the purple one is a queer!")

Caution Homosexual Role-model!

According to a CNN news story dated Feb 10, 1999, Jerry Falwell (head of the now defunct "Moral Majority") contends that the purple color, triangular shaped headset and fact that the character sometimes carries a "bag" are "intentional" gay symbols meant to be cast homosexuals in a positive manner.

As a Christian, I feel that role modeling the gay lifestyle is damaging to the moral lives of children."

What caused this statement? Did the wicked, left-wing "media elite" create a new television show that featured homosexuals in a positive role? (one that didn't end up with the gay person being "reeducated", "saved" or tied to a fence in rural Wyoming).

Nope.

The reverend heard that there was a children's TV character that actually wore a purple suit and had a triangular TV antenna on its head (obviously a FAGGOT! and who better than Jerry Falwell to know?)

Y'all had better keep your kids from watching that! And I would be careful about any football game where the Minnesota Vikings are playing, they wear purple too (but I bet Falwell wouldn't have the guts to call them fags to their faces!)

Just to be on the safe-side, you should avoid all triangular shapes and any occurrence of the color purple (never mind that Jerry's "Personal Website" contains pictures of buildings with triangular shapes in them and advertisements that use the color purple! If Jerry does it, its harmless)

Jerry should also council Dr. Robert Schuller and the famous ministry "Crystal Cathedral" because not only does their Website use the color purple, BUT THEIR CHURCH HAS MANY TRIANGULAR SHAPES! (and as the Falwell has told us, a triangular shape is a positive "gay-pride" symbol!)

On February 20, 1999 at about 12:00 noon (PST) I looked at the official Crystal Cathedral website and even viewed their "Live Cam" which shows pictures of the beautiful cathedral. On this date there is a clear purple-colored rainbow emanating from the church. Is this a symbol that Dr. Schuller's ministry is one of love that is open to all (even gays?) Or is Falwell right, and does this mean that Dr. Schuller IS gay? YOU BE THE JUDGE!

Better yet, enjoy a good chuckle (as I have). Realize that Falwell is a false prophet who is no closer to "god" than any one else on the planet. But BEWARE People like Falwell are out there pushing their agenda to force you into their beliefs. They dream of a day when we will all be stripped of liberty and freedom and forced to believe what they (pretend) to believe and worship as they (pretend) to worship.

Be ever vigilant. Falwell often seems to be a complete buffoon perhaps to keep Patriotic Americans from taking him as a serious threat to Liberty and the American way of life!

Daniel Sherer

DISCLAIMER: Any use of the color PURPLE (or any similar shade thereof) is purely intentional. However, the fact that some letters contain triangles (such as the "A""Y" and "W") is coincidental. Neither of which should be taken as any "subliminal message" from me advocating any type of homo/hetero lifestyle!

Consider novels by Naomi Sherer available on Amazon

Coming Soon: Beyond Namche, The Open Door, Wildly in the Rockies

Last Modified: Monday, 29-Jun-2009 21:06:15 EDT